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PART 2

      Rocky enjoyed his adolescence with his human dad, but a sense of wanting began to eat away at him. Each new toy would bring with it a fleeting feeling of excitement, with inevitable boredom sure to follow. The human would invent game after game, and Rocky would master them all. Rocky had energy to burn. He played and played with the human, but something was missing. He felt anxious and unfulfilled. He yearned to see the outside world, but the human kept saying it was too dangerous.

       There's more to life than this, Rocky concluded. He was a young cat in search of a grand adventure. He had so many questions regarding the outside world that needed answers. Where does that beam of light come from? You know, the one that's warm and gives me a spot to take a nap? Who do these other cats think they are marking up the side of my house? Why is Dad so intent on keeping me indoors? One day, he whizzed past his unsuspecting human into the great unknown! Rocky was free! "Get your fuzzy ass back here!" he heard as he skittered around the corner into the backyard. I am king of the world, he thought... for all of thirty seconds. A big, loud truck came roaring by and scared him under his house. Despite this setback, Rocky found out he liked going outside and getting dirty--much to the dismay of his dad. Rocky took enjoyment in how annoyed Dad would become, but he'd always let the human catch him and bring him back inside. To this day, Rocky continues to defy the human by sneaking out once in a while. He usually doesn't get very far.

 

      One of Rocky's "great escapes" was particularly memorable. This time, he actually left the safety of the area surrounding his house. Our hero's mission that day was of the pre-meditated sort. The objectives were: escape through a newly discovered secret door, find the cats that were offending his little pink nostrils, and confront them. Did he ever put a scare into those cats that day! He puffed out his fur, he growled, he hissed, he screamed, he cursed -- and backed those uncouth neighbor cats into a corner! There was no doubt who ruled this neighborhood.

 

      During his brief travels, Rocky took notice that he was definitely much more handsome than other cats. As you can see, he has big, expressive eyes as well as a cute pink nose. His coat is luxurious to the touch. The color spectrum of his markings broadened as he matured, ranging from a light tan hue found on his tail to the pitch black stripe running down his back. His color pattern is officially referred to as "smoke and white". The human had to clean him after he'd sneak outside, since he'd often come back "smoke and brown". I am adorable and I know it, a confident Rocky would muse. Then one day it came to him: I could be a model! I could be the next cat superstar!

 

      Modeling seemed like the perfect career for Rocky. He had seen pictures of cats all over the internet and felt like he could outshine every one of them. He'd watch videos of other cats frolicking about, jumping into boxes, sliding on the floor, running face-first into glass doors, and the list goes on and on. He'd sit there with his Dad and view all sorts of pictures of cats with words photoshopped on them. He wondered why the human laughed so hard. He's always at the computer and looking at other cats and ignoring me. I'll show him!

 

      After days of searching the want ads, Rocky finally found a modeling gig. There was a company who made Christmas cards, and according to the description they needed "a cat of Asian persuasion" for their next design. Rocky excitedly wrote the company saying, "I'm half Siamese. Is that good enough?" and sent them a picture. It didn't take long for them to get back to our hero. Rocky was hired!

      The modeling agency had given Rocky a call and told him to be expecting a taxi to come pick him up. Rocky wanted a limousine, but he agreed to settle for their accommodations. To Rocky's surprise and disgust, this empty water container was what arrived. Oh well, no one ever told me that the life of a model was all glitz and glamour, thought Rocky. He shimmied inside this odd, cramped transportation device. It was uncomfortable, but he arrived safely.

      After an hour of trying on different clothes and having an annoying light shone in his face, Rocky was ready to run and hide. "Just a little longer", said the gentleman behind the camera. Rocky then saw the cameraman feverishly clicking the fake mouse that humans use to control their computers. "Ok, you can go. Please go to the other room for your payment." Rocky sprinted into the other room and nearly skidded out on the tile floor. A human opened a bag and sprinkled some kibble next to Rocky. Cat treats? That's it? Are you kidding me?! These aren't even the good ones!! fumed Rocky. Could it be our hero had been duped? Either way, a frustrated Rocky returned home, hoping the Christmas card he helped make would get him the notoriety he so desperately sought.

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